Filed under: AWESOME, Concerts, Friends, Insight, love, music | Tags: Amazing, AWESOME, Drew, feelings, guys, happy, life, music
Well, last night was pretty awesome. Party Like Summer had an amazing set (even though I’m a little biased). I was in the front, although it’s not like there were all that many people there to stop me fro being up front. I was a chicken in the beginning and Bradlee walked past me about a billion times, but I was scared so I didn’t say anything. Then after his set I went outside and he was there so we hung out for a little bit and talked. He is a really cool guy and I’m glad that I met him or even texted him in the first place. Thanks Christofer Drew <3 I got tons of hugs and a kiss on the cheek and he told me to call him, which I will.
The only thing that stresses me out about with him is that it’s hard to have actual conversation with him sometimes. I’m not used to having to wait forever for someone to text me back and I don’t mean to be impatient, but it bothers me when he’s like “Im a busy beee” when I know for a fact that he is sitting in a van doing nothing..Lol. Oh well, I don’t need to stress. He is simply a friend.
On an even better note, today was awesome too. I hung out at the house until like one and then went to Drew’s house. We walked around Berkley while he tried to find a job. No luck though. It was nice hanging out with him though. Favorite moment all day : We were sitting on the couch watching tv, my head is on his shoulder, he moves his head down and kisses me. Then after one I turned my head because I thought it was only one and he turns to me and says “I wasn’t done.” and kisses me again. It still makes me smile. It’s just nice to know that the boy I love likes kissing me :]]]
This weekend was amazing.
Oh, I don’t know if I posted, but Groves’ production of Guys and Dolls was AMAZING! I WISH that SL could have shows like that. The Fall Play is this weekend and I hope for the love of Jesus, that it goes well. BREAK A LEG!
Filed under: AWESOME, Insight, random | Tags: Amazing, feelings, Friends, guys, happy, life, school, Travis
Travis told me to write a new blog so I think I will. This week has been kind of okay. I wasn’t feeling that well on monday or tuesday, so on tuesday I didn’t go to school. I talked to Bradlee all day though :] He is someone that is so awesome. I don’t know what is going to happen with him. He is in a band. Their name is Party Like Summer and the music is super amazing! I’m going to his show in Lansing on sunday night. I am excited to see him <3 Bradlee Meredith is simply amazing… I don’t know what else to say.
I miss Krissy :[
Life is kinda okay now. Drew comes home for good either today or tomorrow. I hope that things work out with us. I’m not willing to let go of him, but I don’t know anymore. I had this really long talk with Grace last night. It was really nice. We talked for like 3 hours after everyone else left Bible Study. Last night was a good time <3
Filed under: Friends, Insight, love | Tags: confusion, Drew, Emotions, Friends, guys, happy, Krissy, life, love, Relationships
What do you do when you thought that everything was going amazing and that something seems to throw in a wrench? I feel like this is whats happening. I love Drew. I really do, but sometimes I feel like I am the only one feeling it. I don’t understand why it’s so hard for him to just commit to me. To tell people that I am his “girlfriend”. I don’t even know what to say about him anymore. I can’t really call him my “boyfriend” but he’s not…nothing… I just don’t even know what to say anymore. I can’t give up. I can’t let go. I try to be okay with everything that he puts me through. He doesn’t hurt me on purpose… This is hard.
I hope I see him today.
Travis hugged me yesterday. He was leaning on the lockers and I came and leaned on him and he put his arms around me. It made me happy, but I feel it’s a little too little a little too late.
I love Kris and seeing her this week and spending time with her was amazing. I am soo gladd that she is happy. Pilot is a good guy and he makes her so happy. I am this lasts forever :] I never thought that I would be jealous of my best friend’s LONG DISTANCE relationship though…
Filed under: Friends, Insight, random, school | Tags: Emily, fear, feelings, guys, happy, Krissy, life, Melad, school, Wesley
All I can think about right now is the future. How much I want to go to college. How my idea of the future has changed so much in the last fews years… I’m still scared of the future, but I am more than willing to embrace it now. I feel like I am finally ready to live the life that I deserve. Here is the map for senior year.
SENIOR YEAR 2009-2010
- Go to as many sporting events as possible.
- Have a kick ass final homecoming.
- Work on GSA!
- Join some new clubs.
- Mantain atleast a 3.7 :]
- Get Senior Jersey : ” Disposable Teen” hehe
- Join NHS.
- Land a leading role in Fall Play.
- Be on singles for tennis.
- Be tennis captain for SECOND year <3.
- Be happy.
- Apply to all colleges early.
- Find a boy.
- Spend as much time as possible with Wes, Em, and Mel.
- Visit Kris more often.
- Have a role in the Spring Musical.
- Be ACTUAL member of youth group.
- Learn to play guitar.
- Go to Yale for Spring Break with Wes :]
- GET A JOB!
- Save money for Europe
- Have a bitchin time at Prom.
- Look AMAZING at Graduation.
- Grow hair out.
- Get a car?
- Get second tattoo.
- Do all the “senior” things…
Thats about it for right now. It seems like a good list. I have goals and I think that almost ALL of these are attainable. I can’t wait. I just don’t want to loose that motivation and drive to do this all. I also am a little worried that I am going to run myself ragged. I want to enjoy my senior year, not jampack it and let it run past me….
Filed under: Family, Insight, love | Tags: Blessed, Christmas, Friends, happy, Holiday, Krissy, love, Ode to friendship, Smile, Travis, Wesley
These last couple days have been pretty good. I went to the movies with Wes, Em, Melad, and Mike Randall on Monday. We saw Yes Man and it was sooo good. I loved it! The whole concept was amazing and part of me wishes I could live my life in that sort of way. I wish I could just say yes to all the things that came into my life. It could be a nice way to live. I don’t know, it makes sense though because once I let down the gates and try and have fun, I really am happy.
Yesterday, all I did was clean, do laundry, and wrap presents. It was a slave labor day, but I didn’t mind all that much. The only thing was that I had to make the fucking Mushroom soup for Wigilia at like nine at night. So not cool. I was up until 1:30am…and then woke up around 7:45ish. I have been up all day and I am sooo exhausted man! I took a nap in the car ride home though. Wigilia all and all was pretty good. I saw family, ate good food, and made amazing memories. The mushroom soup was quite a hit and I got a JOHN DEERE LUNCH BOX! I love it. The only thing that was a pain in the ass was the drive to and from because it was in Mayville, which is like two hours from here.
Also, I have been thinking about what this years resolutions are going to be. I don’t know. I think I need to concentrate a little more on AP chem, I need to relax and breathe, and I need to focus on making myself a complete person again.
I am slowly becoming the person that I want to be and it’s all because of those amazing people that I love <3 All the people that have been there for me and without them, I would be the biggest mess. I would be how I always have been. I’m becoming something that I think is good. I am becoming a little more chill when normally, I would have freaked out and been super pissed. I’m just learning to take life one day at a time again.
Let’s make this a “semi-ode” to those that mean the most:
Travis – This boy… he is beyong wonderful and is something that I love having in my life. Everyday I spend with him is a new one that I know I will come to love, cherish, and remember. When he holds me, I see the world in a new light and I feel like I can let go and just have fun again. I just love him. I can’t explain it with any other feeling than love. It’s like, because of him, I know what no-strings, pure, unfiltered joy is. I don’t think it’s something I’ve ever felt. He has become someone soo important to me. I would do anything for him. I want to kiss him in the rain. I want him to be my underrated love story. He is the only person I have ever met, that has my heart and deserves it.
Wesley – Tomorrow will be the official one year anniversary of the day this girl entered my heart. She is someone that I can’t imagine my world without and I’m glad that I don’t have to. She is my best friend, my partner in crime, and without her, I don’t know what I’d do. When I need her, she is always there for me, and even when I don’t need her, she is there for me. She doesn’t judge me EVER. I know that she will always listen to the retarded thoughts that never make sense, but she gets them. It’s because she is usually having the same retarded thought :] She makes everyday fun beyong belief and I’ve never laughed so hard as when I am with her. Je l’aime <3 She like…the super boss man.
Krissy – Always save the best for last right? Krissy is the most amazing person that I think has ever entered my life. She is someone that I will always NEED and WANT to be at my side. When I get married, she will be the one that holds my dress when I pee (okay maybe not, but she will be there to laugh at me when I struggle to pee because that’s what real best friends do). I used to always say, “Without Krissy, I wouldn’t know anyone.” Now it’s, “Without Krissy, I wouldn’t be anyone.” Knowing her and being her friend has changed my life so incredibly much. I can’t imagine going for a long period of time without talking to her, even if it’s just bullshit fluff conversation. Krissy is the sister I never wanted, but now that I have her, I’m never giving her back :]
It’s the season to love and be loved right? I just feel so lucky to have been blessed with so many people in my life that make me so happy
Filed under: AWESOME, Friends, love, school | Tags: Christmas, Emily, Festival, Friends, happy, Holding Hands, Krissy, love, school, Simon, Smiles, Travis, Wesley
The long awaited Christmas break of 2008 and officially here. Today is the first REAL day of break. Yesterday was a snowday, but I wouldn’t have been at school anyway. This last week has been so stressful and to tell the truth, I slept A LOT because I was constantly tired. I don’t mind it now though because it’s like the most chaos I have had in a long time and I kind of needed it. It’s all good chaos though :]
The French Christmas Party was on Wednesday and it was soo fun. I hung out with Wesley and Kevin most of the night. I ate rolls, strawberries, and chocolate most of the night. We sang and it was SOOO HORRIBLE. Half of the kids didn’t know the songs, it was pretty bad. French Four played it off though, we are awesome. I really think that we are the best french class. Lol <3
On thursday, I had an essay due, a math test, locker clean out, and the Fine Art’s Festival. I must say, out of all of those, my favorite was defidently the Festival <3 I got to hang out with Travis and see him perform. I also got to hang with Wesley, Emily, and Simon. I love all my friends so much. After intermission, Travis came down in the audience and sat with me. He held my hand the entire time. At the end, we kissed. It wasn’t one of those long passionate kisses like in movies, but it was sooo special because it was with him. He really is quite amazing.
Oh, did I mention that he is my boyfriend now? Because, he is :]
I can’t wait for the rest of winter break!! I went to Joie’s house yesterday for a holiday party and I had soo much fun, but now I have welt marks on my leg because Cylde beat me with a power cord. With the exception of that, I had amazingly amazing fun times. We ate cookies, played some game called zumi zumi, and ate burgers :] I don’t think that they agreed with me though because last night I got really sick and threw up twice. I am fine now though, I think that it just needed to get out of my system.
I also have talked to a few old friends; Artur and Trevor. Trevor is coming home today and wants to hang out sometime while he is home. I would love to hang out with him, I miss him :] Artur on the other hand is someone that I freaking LOVE man. He was one of my really good friends in middle school and knows like all my deep dark secrets ;] He is a sweet kid and I miss hanging out with him. He still lives in Troy, so hopefully, sometime soon, I will be able to get out there and see everyone.
I’m excited for tomorrow too :] I am hanging out with Krissy during the day and going to the movies tomorrow night. Hopefully, Travis will be allowed to come. I don’t want to go two weeks without seeing him. I will see him the day I get back from Florida though because I shall be attending his swim meet that same day.
Things seem like they are falling into place again you know? I really just hope that they don’t fall apart like they have everyother time. I really like him.
Filed under: AWESOME, Insight, love, music | Tags: happy, Jason Mraz, love, music, Relationships, Smile, Travis
Music has always played a role in my life. It is how I feel and when everything is crumbling it will always comfort me. It’s my rock.
Well, according to my music listenings as of lately, I am really happy :] I am listening to a lot of Jason Mraz which is really upbeat music. It is also really lovey. I really like this new finding <3 I have also realized that the music that is sinking into my mind and soul is so happy is because of that one kid, what is his name again? Oh yeah, Travis. He is simply amazing and even though we aren’t together, he is mine.
Also, because I go on Facebook so much, I tend to get stuck on bumper stickers a lot. Hehe. Doesn’t everyone though? I send Travis a lot of bumper stickers, but they are adorable. One said “Lets flip a coin. Head and I’m yours…Tails and you’re mine <3″ I can’t stop smiling and I hope I don’t anytime soon
[I get to see Krissy and Sarah soon]… X-mas is in 12 days <3
Filed under: AWESOME, love | Tags: Christopher, happy, Holding Hands, Kissing, love, Tuesday, Wesley
I don’t know how I got so lucky man. I found THE most amazing guy that I think I have ever met. His name is Christopher and I have mentioned him before. I don’t know if I put that we ended up not talking for a few days because he was scared of what my brother would do, but it did happen. Four days later he texted me at four in the morning to say that he was sorry and that he liked me. He also mentioned that he still really wanted to see me. I am amazing, but REALLY happy. He is one of those guys that just make you feel kind of complete.
It’s hard to see him because he works a lot and because we have decided that it would be best to NOT tell my mom or my brother, I can’t really see him on the weekends, when he doesn’t work. Luckily, he doesn’t work on Tuesday though. Last Tuesday he drove all the way from Troy to pick me up at school then we went to his house. We wacthed most of Superbad because I have never seen it, but then he just layed there staring at me. Thats ALL he did. He just looked at me. It was really nice though because it was those “this girl is amazing” look not the “this chick is hot… I wanna fuck her” look. Then he kissed my forehead <3 To me that is like THE sweetest thing ever. We ended up kissing a lot and then he had to take me home. He gave me goodbye kisses and held my hand on the car ride home :] He makes me soo happy.
I think that my Tuesdays were doomed to be amazing always <3 First Wesley, Now Christopher. It’s Saturday now and I have talked to him like non-stop everyday since last Tuesday. My birthday is on wednesday so he is taking me out to dinner and a movie on tuesday. I can’t wait. He is amazing :] :] :] :]
Last night he sent me the most amazing text. “You mean the whole world to me green eyes. I love you so much.” <3 He calls me green eyes. Not the best nickname, but sweet nontheless. All the people that matter all ready now the more intimate details and that is how it is going to stay. I am sooo happy though… and thanks Kris for being happy for me :]
We made up.
Today was amazing.
His kisses give me butterflies.
His touch makes me float.
I can’t remember the last time I was this happy :]
