Filed under: AWESOME, Family, Friends, Insight, love, music, religion, school | Tags: Changing, Christopher, confusion, Emily, Friends, Krissy, life, love, music, Relationships, religion, Travis, Wesley
Well, I haven’t blogged in awhile so I guess I’ll do an update because that the only way for me to get in everything to all those people that DON’T read this… Hehe. I wonder why I keep writing. I only know like three people that read this. Oh well.
Friends: Everything with them is GREAT! I don’t see Wes or Emily too much anymore, but we talk and hang when we can. Now that I think about it, I don’t think Wes, Emily, and I have all hung out together since school let out. Well, that’s something to add to the list of summer stuff. I haven’t talked to Melad in awhile and I think I might text her soon. I have been talking to and hung out with Amanda again. It was good to see her, it’s been some time. Side Note: Clayton got suppperrr hot. He is going to teach me to play the guitar as a trade off and I am going to help him with Algebra.
I hang out with Kris, Gabs, Sarah, Lorenzo and the whole gang whenever I can. Couple days ago we played kick the can and smoked Hookah on the roof of a strip mall. It was pretty amazing. Went to the mall with Krissy and Sarah yesterday. It’s random stuff, but still fun because it’s people I love being around. Ummm… Ron is back from California. He left because he didn’t feel he belonged in Michigan anymore. He was gone for about a month. Then he made his way back.It’s nice having him around again. He has a new job at Valvoline and it’s funnnnyyy.
I have been making some new friends too. I hang out and talk to the people from youth group quite a bit. It’s nice having OTHER friends to talk to sometimes. Just adding to the collection. Jordan is one of the people that I LOVE hanging out with. He is my age, going to be a senior at Groves. He swims and is super involved at school. He is just a chill guy he makes me feel good when I am around him. Another person I talk to and hang with is Stucky. He is a nice guy, going to be sophmore at Groves and to be honest, he is a giant pot head. I deal with it though. I don’t smoke with him so it’s whatever. Karly is the closest girl to me. She is like soo sweet. She is a cheerleader at Lasher and is going to be Senior. I love her :]]
School: IT’S SUMMER BABY!!! NO SCHOOL. ( I still have hella summer homework though :[ )
Work: I honestly LOVE my job. It's not that hard and I love coming to a place where I get along with the people. It's nice to have a payday too :] I get paid above minimum wage, I get paid in cash and I only work about two days a week. We have two cooks, they are both really nice people, but honestly I HAVE to say that working with Tony H is wayyy more fun. He is a sweetheart and kinda cute too ;] Lol. He is just such a nice guy that I’d rather work with him over Little Tony anyday… My boss is Gabby’s dad and he is soooo intense. He is like loud and will speak his mind no matter what. He did me a HUGE favor by giving me a job and I will love him forever :] He kinda a hard ass though. I don’t mind though, I respect him for it.
Boys: I’ve been a little rocky on this path. There have been so many issues and I don’t know where I left off.
Travis - I’ve only talked to him once since school let out. A 17 minute phone call. I miss him a lot I am not going to lie.
Christopher – I am done with that asshole. He broke my heart for the second time and didn’t give a shit. He said he was in love with me and then he didn’t want to be with me. I still loves me as a friend and wants in my pants. I don’t think so. Go find some whore in Arizona to mess with, I’m better than that.
Anthony – I’m not really quite sure what is up with me and him. He texts to see if I wanna hang and stuff, but it doesn’t seem like he really wants to. I don’t know. It’s just too shady for my taste.
Jordan – I really like him but I know I can’t do anything about those feelings due to the fact that he still has a gf and I’ve gone down that road before. It’s not a good one, no one wins, everyone gets hurt. For now he is just a friend and that’s all he is going to be until he is single and interested in me. The part that is so hard is like we have soo much in common and he is so easy to open up and talk to. He makes me feel like such an amazing girl, especially when he tells me so :] Which he has… I don’t know. I want to hang with him more than I do and it’s gonna be boss when we go to State together :]]]]]]]]]]]]]]
God – I have been blessed and now I can see how much HE has done for me. He is reason I am alive and living this amazing life. I know that sometimes I can lead myself into temptation and do things that I shouldn’t, but in the end, God is going to forgive me because he knows I am truely sorry. I used to be so scared that God would walk out on me because I do so much wrong and have given up on him before, but now I know that he never will. He will never give up on me. He sent me on Mission Trip to become enlighted and help people know his love like I do. Little did I know that Mission would have such an impact on me. It brought me so much closer to him and I am grateful beyond words for that. All I can do is pray that my relationship continues to grow and I don’t stray again.
Filed under: AWESOME, Concerts, Friends, love, music, religion, school | Tags: AWESOME, Emily, Family, Food, Friends, Krissy, life, religion, school
This weekend was pretty damn amazing :] With the exception of having my phone stolen on Friday… I just checked at security too and no one turned it in. The people there kind of laughed at me when I said I thought someone would turn it in. Now I have to get a new phone… Oh well though… shit happens and I can’t change it now so why linger?
NOW TO SATURDAY! On saturday morning, I went to Golf and Tennis with Kathy and got my racquet re-strung. It looks soooo boss man. I have bright neon yellow strings now 
It goes great with the blue face and orange grip. I love that I can spot my racquet from like seven miles away… atleast I know no one could steal it now and then use it infront of me. While we were waiting, we went to Subway. This is when my mother became embarrassing, which she normally isn’t, and basically told Kathy our life story. Maybe not EVERYTHING, but she got close. Lets just say that Kathy now knows A LOT more than she did before….
After we dropped Kathy off my mom did some quick errands and we went home. I got ready and left like an hour and a half or so later…. I drove to Emily’s house and then to Northbrook for SoulFire. IT WAS SOOO MUCH FUN!!!! I never thought that God and Jesus and anything at church could be so enjoyable. There were games and music and cards and all that good stuff. Then we had a music packed worship led by Seven Glory and Bob. Bob is the youth director there…. he’s a cool guy. After the worship, Seven Glory had a concert and Em and I were jamming out. We didn’t even notice when Abby and Sara were gone. They weren’t as into it as Em and I were.
After the concert, Em asked if I wanted to spend the night at her house. Her mom said yes. My mom said yes. I went home after got some clothes and drove back to Em’s. I was really shocked that my mother let me take the car and KEEP it like all night/morning. I had a really good time at Emily’s house. We slept on the pullout couch and spent like a billion hours talking. We were up until four in the morning talking actually. Then we had to get up at like 8:30am for church.
I really did enjoy church though. At Northbrook they seem to make things fun, and… different… in a way I can understand it. I told my mom that I want to become a member there and both her and Emily said that I should take some more time and make SURE that it is the church for me before I make such a big commitment. It’s understandable, but I mean, I’ve been there before and I REALLY like it there. I don’t know.. I guess it doesn’t hurt to take some more time and be absolutely POSITIVE. After church, Mrs. S got us all bagels, but I had to leave right after I ate.
When I got home we had to leave again to meet Diane and Carol for Brunch. I had a lot of fun with them, I always do. They really are like my favorite family members. We went to Bob Evans and the omelette was SOOOOOOOOOO good. I wanted more. That too and the home fries were crazy good.
We went to Aunt Pat’s after and I slept. We went home. Mom and Bruce got into this really big fight when we got home. Mom was all like GET OUT and Bruce was all like FUCK YOU and it was just screaming and yelling and craziness. I locked myself in the bathroom until they were done. Then I went to sleep, got up, ate, watched tv, went back to sleep. I was a sleepy girl :]
OHHH. I got a new nose stud on Friday too :] It’s a peace sign and I am in LOVE with it.
I get to get a new phone though :] Hopefully a samsung Gravtiy like I want.
I can’t wait until Friday!!! I get to see Krissy!! I am going to Ann Arbor for Relay for Life so I’m spending most of the weekend there. I CAN’T WAIT!
NEXT WEEK IS SPRING BREAK! YAY! (Too bad all I’m going to do is play tennis because we have two-a-days Monday thru Thursday.)
Filed under: Friends, Insight, random, school | Tags: Emily, fear, feelings, guys, happy, Krissy, life, Melad, school, Wesley
All I can think about right now is the future. How much I want to go to college. How my idea of the future has changed so much in the last fews years… I’m still scared of the future, but I am more than willing to embrace it now. I feel like I am finally ready to live the life that I deserve. Here is the map for senior year.
SENIOR YEAR 2009-2010
- Go to as many sporting events as possible.
- Have a kick ass final homecoming.
- Work on GSA!
- Join some new clubs.
- Mantain atleast a 3.7 :]
- Get Senior Jersey : ” Disposable Teen” hehe
- Join NHS.
- Land a leading role in Fall Play.
- Be on singles for tennis.
- Be tennis captain for SECOND year <3.
- Be happy.
- Apply to all colleges early.
- Find a boy.
- Spend as much time as possible with Wes, Em, and Mel.
- Visit Kris more often.
- Have a role in the Spring Musical.
- Be ACTUAL member of youth group.
- Learn to play guitar.
- Go to Yale for Spring Break with Wes :]
- GET A JOB!
- Save money for Europe
- Have a bitchin time at Prom.
- Look AMAZING at Graduation.
- Grow hair out.
- Get a car?
- Get second tattoo.
- Do all the “senior” things…
Thats about it for right now. It seems like a good list. I have goals and I think that almost ALL of these are attainable. I can’t wait. I just don’t want to loose that motivation and drive to do this all. I also am a little worried that I am going to run myself ragged. I want to enjoy my senior year, not jampack it and let it run past me….
Filed under: AWESOME, Friends, random | Tags: Amazing, Emily, Food, Friends, Travis, Wesley
Well, break isn’t so bad. I have tennis practice all week. I had set today and I have it tomorrow, I don’t mind though because I get to see the people that I love. I get to hang out and bug Michael while he plays his bass. I get to bug Emily while she dances. I get to bug Simon while he sings. It all good fun. The only thing that sucks though man is that I have to wake up at like 7am. Thats crazzzzzzzzzzyyyyyyyyyy. I was tired, but it was okay because when I got home, I ate and went to sleep. I think another reason I was so tired is because I hung out with Rachel last night.
OMFG!!!! Rachel Benson is amazing! I love that girl man. We hung out last night. She texted me and asked if I wanted to hang out. I was like heck yea because I love chillin with Rachel, it’s like… you never know what is going to happen. So here is what happened. First she came over and we picked a movie; Hairspray. We watched the movie and sang to EVERY song. It was horribly off key, but full of love. Then we smoked two coals worth of Hookah. Went to MickeyD’s and ate. I think that the people who were working thought that we were high because we were giggling like crazy and Rachel dropped the money outside.
All and all though, from the two days I’ve experienced, Mid-Winter Break 2009 is going to be fun times man!!!!!!!!!!!!
Oh, about Valentine’s Day. I wasn’t alone. I went to the movies with Wes, Em, and Laddie. We saw Confessions of a Shopaholic and it was soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo good. I loved it. I want a guy like that. I want a guy to say she’s not my girlfriend… she’s not you when I ask if some other girl is his. I want the kind of love that can withstand the hard times. I can hardly get love this last through the easy times. I mean come on, my last bf broke up with me when he didn’t even see me for two weeks….. What the hell man.
I have Tennis in an hour and like barely anyone is going to be there because it’s only for an hour, but I do love practice with Coach Joe and I have honestly missed Tuesday night practices :]
I’m glad that I don’t suck at tennis because I haven’t really planned in months.
Filed under: AWESOME, Friends, love | Tags: Emily, Friendship, Krissy, Living, love, Melad, Michael, Poetry, Travis, Trevor, Wesley
I carry your heart with me, I carry it in my heart
I am never without it
anywhere I go you go, my dear
and whatever is done by only me is your doing, my darling
I fear no fate for you are my fate, my sweet
I want no world for beautiful you are my world, my true
and it’s you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you
Here is the deepest secret nobody knows
Here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life; which grows
higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide
and this is the wonder that’s keeping the stars apart
I carry your heart, I carry it in my heart .
– E.E. Cummings
This is the most amazing poem ever written. I dedicate this is all the people I love, all the people that are carried in my heart, all the people that matter. Without you, my tree would die. Actually, I don’t think that it would be there in the first place. You are the reason I get up and breathe everyday. I love you.
Krissy <3
Wesley <3
Travis <3
Michael <3
Melad <3
Emily <3
Trevor <3
Filed under: AWESOME, Friends, love, school | Tags: Christmas, Emily, Festival, Friends, happy, Holding Hands, Krissy, love, school, Simon, Smiles, Travis, Wesley
The long awaited Christmas break of 2008 and officially here. Today is the first REAL day of break. Yesterday was a snowday, but I wouldn’t have been at school anyway. This last week has been so stressful and to tell the truth, I slept A LOT because I was constantly tired. I don’t mind it now though because it’s like the most chaos I have had in a long time and I kind of needed it. It’s all good chaos though :]
The French Christmas Party was on Wednesday and it was soo fun. I hung out with Wesley and Kevin most of the night. I ate rolls, strawberries, and chocolate most of the night. We sang and it was SOOO HORRIBLE. Half of the kids didn’t know the songs, it was pretty bad. French Four played it off though, we are awesome. I really think that we are the best french class. Lol <3
On thursday, I had an essay due, a math test, locker clean out, and the Fine Art’s Festival. I must say, out of all of those, my favorite was defidently the Festival <3 I got to hang out with Travis and see him perform. I also got to hang with Wesley, Emily, and Simon. I love all my friends so much. After intermission, Travis came down in the audience and sat with me. He held my hand the entire time. At the end, we kissed. It wasn’t one of those long passionate kisses like in movies, but it was sooo special because it was with him. He really is quite amazing.
Oh, did I mention that he is my boyfriend now? Because, he is :]
I can’t wait for the rest of winter break!! I went to Joie’s house yesterday for a holiday party and I had soo much fun, but now I have welt marks on my leg because Cylde beat me with a power cord. With the exception of that, I had amazingly amazing fun times. We ate cookies, played some game called zumi zumi, and ate burgers :] I don’t think that they agreed with me though because last night I got really sick and threw up twice. I am fine now though, I think that it just needed to get out of my system.
I also have talked to a few old friends; Artur and Trevor. Trevor is coming home today and wants to hang out sometime while he is home. I would love to hang out with him, I miss him :] Artur on the other hand is someone that I freaking LOVE man. He was one of my really good friends in middle school and knows like all my deep dark secrets ;] He is a sweet kid and I miss hanging out with him. He still lives in Troy, so hopefully, sometime soon, I will be able to get out there and see everyone.
I’m excited for tomorrow too :] I am hanging out with Krissy during the day and going to the movies tomorrow night. Hopefully, Travis will be allowed to come. I don’t want to go two weeks without seeing him. I will see him the day I get back from Florida though because I shall be attending his swim meet that same day.
Things seem like they are falling into place again you know? I really just hope that they don’t fall apart like they have everyother time. I really like him.
Filed under: AWESOME, Friends, love | Tags: 007, Amazing, AWESOME, Boss, Dreams, Emily, Friends, James Bond, love, Michael, movies, Panic, Perfect, Travis, Wesley
Today was an AMAZING day…
I didn’t get to see Travie Boy and Michael though and that was kinda the only thing that bummed me out. I had a perfect dream. I wrote a note on my phone when I woke up, here it is: “I had this dream we were together. We were at a party. When danger appeared and you thought you were going to lose me, you held me in your arms and told me that you loved me. I looked into your eyes and knew it was real. All I could do was say, “I love you too.” Then the danger was gone and you still loved me, but we had to hide it. Our love was forbidden. When we got to the end of that street you let go of my hand, held my face in your arms, and kissed me. You said that I could get by without you, but that I would never have to. You would always be there for me. When we got inside and were seperated, I searched across the room and when our eyes locked, neither of us could control the smiles we both had. We walked towards each other and kissed without thinking. The world was watching us now. The world knew and we didn’t care. We had each other. The last thing I remember before I woke up was you whispering in my ear, “I will always love you, I hope everyone knows.”
I’m not going to say who it is about though… I don’t want freaking. I paniced after I woke up, but I was smiling. It’s complicated. That’s all I can say. I’m just really confusing and emotionally conflicted.
Oh, back to the amazing night <3 Wes, Emily, Me, Teddy, Micah, Ryan, and Brian went to go see 007 and it was sooo BOSS. We had to sit in the front because there were so many people and there weren’t seven seats together. There was sooo much action in the movie. I didn’t really want to go see it, but I did because they did. I think the thing that made it so fun was because I was sitting next to Emily and she talks just as much as I do and we were saying random shit the WHOLE movie. I really wish that Michael and Travie Boy could have come, too bad though. There will be other movies right? I hope so. Tonight was a blast!!!!
