Filed under: AWESOME, Alcohol, Concerts, Friends, Insight, music | Tags: Alcohol, AWESOME, Bradlee, feelings, Friends, music, random, songs, Travis
Tonight is supposed to be the night. Tonight is the night I am going to Lansing to see Bradlee. I texted him this morning though and now I am more confused than ever. Nevermind. He just texted me back…. He makes me feel smile and gives me butterflies. I feel like this is some kind of dream though because I mean, what music loving girl doesn’t wanna get with the lead singer of a band? I’m pretty sure every girl does. It’s hot. He told me to come find him before the show, well as soon as I get there. I am so excited to see him in action. He is such a sweetheart and the music is amazing too. I am listening to the song “All We Know” right now it makes my stomach turn, but in a good way. I hope that even if things don’t work out like they do in my head, they still work out well. The whole night is seeming to fall together. I am leaving around like 4 and the show starts at 5:30. Then after the show, well what happens happens and I am crashing at Sarah’s for the night. My mom thinks that Sarah is coming with me. I am a little worried to go alone, but I mean, it’s a bar in Lansing with undiscovered bands playing, what could happen. The only thing I am stressing is that he has only seen me in pictures and when he sees me in person he won’t like what he sees. I am a fat slob in person and I have learned how to angle pics to make me look super good. I don’t know. I need to calm down and not stress out. Thats not what I need right now.
Oh, I’m also a little worried about how Tuesday is going to go. It will be when I go back to school and see Travis. I got a little drunk on Friday and texted him some kinda forward things. I mean, with him, I always wanna give him another shot because he is so important to me and my everyday life. I just don’t want to freak him out like I have a habit of doing with guys… A LOT.
Whatever. I don’t wanna talk about that anymore. I already kind of regret saying that stuff to him. When I think about it I kind of sound like a whore, which I know I’m not, I just have a lot of whore tendencies. It’s just when I see Travis, I think about how he hasn’t done ANYTHING more than holding hands and a simple kiss on the lips and how I know he wants to do more so bad, but doesn’t feel comfortable with a girl enough to do anything. I mean if anyone, he should be comfortable with me right? He trusts me and I am like his best friend. I don’t know. I just don’t want someone to take advantage of him or for him to have a bad first experience with some horrible girl. I want him to have it with me. Honestly, that sounds horrible. It sounds like I am some Dazed and Confused actor trying to deflower the young girls. “Thats one thing I love about high school girls. I keep getting older and they stay the same age.” 
DDD Tsk Tsk Janelle :p
Filed under: Alcohol, Friends | Tags: Alcohol, feelings, Food, Friends, Krissy, school, self
I am sitting in a college dorm right now. The college dorm belongs to my VERY VERY good friend, Sarah. I love her to bits and pieces and I can’t imagine high school without her. She made my freshman year one of the best freshman years a girl could wish for…. Ahhh the times
Last night is also a time to add to the books. Yes, this is another blog about getting really drunk at Michigan State. The only bummer is that I didn’t get to have chinese take out at like three in the morning. I don’t even think I was awake at three. I don’t even know what time we left the party, or when we went to Renzo’s dorm, or when I got to Sarah’s dorm. All I know it that I threw up at all three places. Not nice. I didn’t like it all, but heyyy, that’s what I get for chugging so much alcohol in like an hour or two.
I’ll finish this later because I have to go have iHop :]
Oh, I also love Krissy. Yesterday, she did what a best friend does and it makes me see how lucky I really am to have her in my life. She’s there for me when I need her and for that I will be forever greatful <3
Filed under: AWESOME, Friends, Insight, random | Tags: Alcohol, Birthday, Brian, feelings, Food, Friends, Krissy, Michael, Mom, Party, Thanksgiving, Vacation
This break is going well. I have been hanging out with Krissy a lot and I love it. It is sooo nice to be hanging out with her. It’s almost like old times. I spent the night at her house last night and it was sooo fun. I didn’t stay up very late though because I was up so early for “Black Tuesday” so I had been awake since 4.30 am. It was good though because I got some x-mas things that I wanted. We were watching Boogeyman and because I had already seen it before, I fell asleep early, but it was nice. We slept on the couch in the living room and when I woke up she was right there next to me. Her doggie was sleeping on my lap though :]
I also am currently at another friend’s house. Tomorrow is his birthday and we are at his house to celebrate turning 20. He is kind of like an asshole, but he defidently has his moments and can be a nice guy.. like right now. He is giving me alcohol and letting me use his laptop. He tells a lot of random stories too which is nice because I feel like I am getting to know him better. He really can be a great guy.
I am going to get back to my friends now. There hasn’t been much more to this break then hanging out. I will write about Thanksgiving, but it wasn’t all that good. My mom pissed me the fuck off, but that is something else for another post because it goes into sooo much more drama that I don’t need to bring up.
BRING on THE ALCOHOL!!!! Tonight, I am going to drink away all my problems… Mainly Michael, WHO by the way, finally got a facebook. That is boss and I am kinda of wondering if HE actually made it.
This is BOSS post by the way :]
Filed under: Friends, Insight, random | Tags: Alcohol, Angela's Ashes, Back to School, Drew, Drunk, Grounded, Summer Reading, The Awakening, Updates, Wesley
I don’t know what to think anymore. I have been feeling really good and I don’t think that I should. I went to a party on Friday night and got piss drunk… then I came home and my mother found out. I am now grounded for a week and it’s not that bad. I think that if I had a kid I would have given them WAY more punishment. The only downfall is that she is making me clean the house like a fucking slave. On Saturday I had to clean/scrub the bathroom. Sunday was the living room and kitchen. Today wasn’t that bad. I had to take out the garbage, vacum, clean the kitty litter, clean the walls in the hallway, and do the dishes. I know that it kind of seems like a lot, but it’s all relatively small things so it’s easy peasy man.
The one thing that I am looking foward to this week for sure is picking up my Welcome back to school packet!!! I am sooo excited. I wanted to go today, but I have to go with my mom and she had to work early. I think that I am going tomorrow because mom doesn’t have to work until like 4. I AM SOOO PUMPED MAN! I know it’s kind of nerdy to like school, but I do. I can’t wait to go back. The only thing that I am stressing about is finishing my summer reading. I have to read 3 books and I am about half way in two of them. One of the books is Angela’s Ashes by Frank McCourt and it is a really good book so far. I am also about half way done with The Awakening by Kate Chopin. I am not looking foward to finishing the The Awakening because one, I already know how it ends thanks to my amazing friends and two, it’s just an incredibly boring book. I doesn’t matter much though because I currently don’t have the book… I left it at Krissy’s house and at the moment it is impossible to get it back. Either I can’t get to her house or she won’t come to mine. I guess I will just focus on finishing Angela’s Ashes and starting Self-Relience and Other Essays. I don’t really think that I have to read the book though because they gave us a passage to answer the questions from. I think that I’m going to read it though, just to be safe.
Wow, this has been an amazingly boring blog. I apoligize if you had to read that.
Updates:
- I haven’t talked to Trevor in a few days.
- I haven’t talked to Michael since the day I made a fool of myself.
- When I got drunk I talked to Drew on Myspace and was a total whiny bitch … I asked him why he didn’t love me anymore and stuff like that. He told me that he still did, but I don’t believe him.
- After number 3 I sent him kind of a last try message : I’m sorry that I have been so pissy and mad at you lately. I just really miss you and I love you. I haven’t heard you say that you love me in over 3 months. I miss “us”. I just miss loving you and being happy. You probally aren’t going to reply and if you do it will be one word, but I thought that maybe it was worth a shot.
Janelle
P.S.
I really did mean it when I told you that I would love you forever and I still do. - Reading it again I know think that I am a giant pussy.
- I haven’t seen Wesley in two weeks and I am going CRAZY!!!!!!
I came home yesterday from tennis practice. Innocent as a lamb. I come home and who is here? My brother and his best friend Chris. What were they doing? Playing beer pong. Duh. I should have known. I ended up playing with them and I got so fucking toasted. I was walking around and I don’t even know how many times I fell dude. I made like 4 boxes of Mac and Cheese too. Bruce and Chris have this weird thing about Macaroni and Cheese with Cheese Puffs. It looks so fucking gross. They wanted me to try it and I wouldn’t because I think that I would have fucking thrown up. I played like 6 games of beer pongs and I am pretty good.
Scores:
Bruce and Janelle vs. Chris
JANELLE WIN
Bruce and Janelle vs. Chris
JANELLE WIN
Chris and Janelle vs. Bruce
JANELLE WIN
Chris and Janelle vs. Bruce
BRUCE WIN
I was so drunk by the end of the 4th game that I don’t remember you was winning after that I have no idea who won. It was fun though. I have never drank with my brother before or any of his friends. I kept calling guys. I was texting people too. I texted Steven and told him that I loved him. I didn’t mean it in the LOVE LOVE way, but he was freaking because he knew that I was drunk and COULD have meant it the other way. I don’t love him in that way though. I do love him, but it’s because he has been there for me lately. He has been my rock and when I felt like shit he has been there. I have really grown close to him in the late couple months. I am going to miss him a lot next year. He promised that he won’t ignore me though so it’s all good.
I have realized something. I tend to call people when I get drunk. People I called when I was drunk:
-
Drew
-
Michael
-
Mike
-
Bookert
I didn’t call Steven, but I texted him.
I need to have my phone taken from me when I drink. Actually, I am really proud that I didn’t throw up from the beer. I wanted to though. I went into the bathroom and TRIED to throw up, but it didn’t work. Lmao. I call people that I have had feelings for all of these people at one time. ALL of them I liked at one time. God, I think that I am glad that no one picked up.
